Brentwood, California- Tony sat, as he often does, looking at his phone texting, when all of sudden he says, “Who the fuck is this guy?” After some back and forth texting it dawned on him that “this guy” wanted him to play a part in his next movie. Remembering back, Tony recalled a guy coming into Porn Star Karaoke and asking him a lot of questions, especially about nude pageants. Thinking nothing more of it, apparently “this guy” took it very seriously and several months later there we were in L.A. and there was ‘this guy” asking Tony to play a part. Sure, so with the right place and the right time thing going on, we were set to shoot early Thursday morning. “Oh and bring Schevelle. I have a part for her too. She’s blond, right?” And thus another adventure with Batman began.
Now, I am grateful that my job is during what the rest of the world considers “off times”, that way I don’t sit in the daily nine or five traffic. If I had to do that, I would run myself over with my car or shoot someone. Tony said, “The shoot is in Brentwood, which is about twenty miles away.” Okay, I thought in my little naïve Texas head, about thirty minutes. “So how much time should we give ourselves to get there?” The answer came, “About an hour, an hour and a half.” I stared at him in disbelief, thinking he was kidding, he wasn’t. It’s easy to see why people go postal and shoot someone there.
Navigating through the streets with that great piece of shit called a GPS and hearing the statement “recalculating” constantly we end up before a palatial estate and I noticed for the first time, there are no bars on the houses in this neighborhood. We pulled in at the same time as the lead actress, Cerina Da Graca and headed to the back of the house where we joined the other actresses who were standing around looking a little confused.
Everyone began to introduce themself and it was in that moment that I realized there appears to be a misconception out there about what I do for a living. As we introduced ourselves and made references to what we did for a living, I tried to explain when they questioned what a feature entertainer was. I told them it’s like a traveling showgirl, you perform main stage, themed dance performances with props, lights and elaborate costumes. That usually gets a blank stare and an “Oooohhh” as a response. However, as the day rolled on and the ladies loosened up and became a little more familiar with me, I could see things change and they became more curious. Especially one girl, I called her Baywatch girl.
Cerina Da Graca and Baywatch girl (I call her this because she proudly stated she was once on Baywatch, I even got to see her Baywatch run) performed their scene, then it was time for another actress Magda and Da Graca to film their scene. Sipping on my fifth cup of coffee now, I vibrated over and began to talk to Baywatch girl. Her name was Alicia Arden and she was very inquisitive about what Tony and I did for a living. Her bright blue eyes lit up as she stated that she had made it to the final round of America’s Got Talent, but at the last minute got cut. “You know, you should really look in to that. Have you ever been a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader? Do you ever watch that show?” she fired rapidly. “No, I don’t really watch too much TV. and ‘yes’, I tried out for the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders, but I didn’t make it”, I answered. “I think there outfits are so cute. I’m thinking of making one for Halloween except I won’t use so much silver. Hey, what’s he doing?” Alicia asked as she pointed at Tony. “He’s twittering”, I said. “What’s that? Wait, I think I signed up for that, but then I never went back to it.” And the hand off goes to Tony. Arden reminded me of a little girl who is so intrigued with something and then she suddenly shifts gears and becomes enthralled with something shiny, “Oooo a penny.” She began to fire questions at Tony about Twittering, Facebook, Myspace, the universe, I lost track. De Graca and Magda wrapped up their scene and the director called me and Tony over.
Finally, it was our turn to film and I had no idea what the director expected. Tony was cool and calm as he played Jason Drake, reporter extraordinaire and I was Pageant Girl #1, a tough reach, I know. We filmed the scene and the director says, “Yaaaa, um, could you be more……..Paris Hilton like?” Paris, got it. We filmed it again, “Yaaaaa, okay, um, could you be more nineteen years old like?” Okay, nineteen year old Paris Hilton, sure. So I did the part the exact same way and he goes, “Great! That’s it.” The filming kept going as Tony had a few more scenes to film and I walked out to the car to get my jacket. Cerina was walking out to her car at the same time so I tried to get to know her a little bit. “Are you from here?” I asked. “No, I’m from Arizona”, she answered, “Cool. That’s a pretty state” I said. “Have you lived in L.A. long?” I continued. “Just a couple of years” came her response. “So how long have you and Tony known each other?” she asked. “Forever” came my rebuttal. Enough getting to know her. This situation was sort of funny to me because as we walked in there were a couple of actresses standing next to Tony “So are you a body builder or something?” one of them coed as she touched his shoulder. You know people have a misconception about the girls in strip clubs being forward, but truthfully they are hired to be forward, men come into clubs expecting and hoping these women will be forward. However, after that shoot I think mainstream actresses do a helluva good job accomplishing the same thing.
The afternoon actresses were coming in to film their scenes and we were done with ours, plus we had to get back to Long Beach, workout and get to the club for nighttime performances. In closing, I will say… thank goodness mainstream actresses would never consider being nude dancers because they would put us out of business.